This past weekend I participated in my fourth half marathon. After battling a foot injury since January, I went into this race filled with doubt. I wasn’t really sure if I would be able to finish, but I knew I was determined to try.
I started the race with a couple of my running buddies. I knew I wouldn’t see them for long because, as I’ve gotten slower, they’ve gotten faster. A lot faster. Sure enough, before the 1 mile mark they were out of my sight, leaving me nearly 2 ½ hours to run alone…well, as alone as you can be in a race with 35,000 participants. 🙂
This alone time gave me a lot of time to think. As I looked in front of me, there were people running for as far as I could see. There were literally thousands of other people doing exactly the same thing I was doing. As I gazed ahead at the sea of runners, it struck me that while I thought it was pretty awesome that I was running a half marathon, in comparison to the other 34,999 people around me, it was really nothing special at all.
But wait a minute, I thought. What does my race have to do with the other 34,999 people running with me? A few steps later I knew the answer: absolutely nothing.
If you’re someone who compares yourself to others, then you might frequently find yourself in the comparison trap that I almost fell into during my half marathon. The way to stay out of this trap is to know that what someone else does or doesn’t do has no impact on your success. Instead, the best way to move forward and get better is to make your only point of comparison yourself and your unique journey. What have you had to overcome to get where you are? Celebrate that! What does a successful next step look like for you? Identify it and then do it!
Half way through the race, we ran inside the Indianapolis Motor Speedway. It’s a very long track!
During the half marathon I quickly decided to focus on what I had overcome to get to the starting line. That made this race matter to me, no matter how quickly (or slowly) I made it to the finish line. I decided to celebrate my determination to do the race, even though my foot wasn’t in great shape and my training hadn’t been as robust as it had been in past half marathons. Next, I decided to figure out what could make this race successful for me. It wasn’t going to be my fastest, which is my usual goal. So how could I re-frame success to make the race a positive one? I decided to focus on enjoying the race and taking it all in, something that I hadn’t done with past races where my goal was speed. I took the time to high five the kids and other spectators that were handing out high fives along the race course. I read spectator’s signs and acknowledged those who were cheering me on. And I made it a point to thank the volunteers at every water station. Due to foot pain, I had to walk the last 3 miles of the race. But it didn’t matter. Based on my new point of focus, the race was already a success.
Back home after the race. The shirt says it all…Will. Finish. Indy.
Next time you find yourself falling into the comparison trap, I invite you to take a step back and change your point of focus. Stop worrying about everyone (or anyone) else and turn your focus to you. What have you had to overcome to get where you are? Celebrate it! What does a successful next step look like for you? Identify it and then do it!
It works, my friend. This was my slowest half to date, and yet in many ways it was the most rewarding.
How about you? Do you find yourself falling into the comparison trap? Please share your thoughts and ideas in the comments below.
Congratulations on finishing the Indy Mini Marathon!
I missed doing it this year. I’ve been dealing with a hip injury that I sustained training for it two years ago, but I think we have finally figured out a cure.
I hope you liked the mini. It’s our hometown race and it’s always a great event. Did you enjoy running around the track?
I agree with you regarding changing the focus to yourself. We often focus so much on others and comparisons that we lose sight of what our own version of success is. It’s so much more productive if we define personal success and aim to achieve that definition.
Hi, Jen,
Thanks so much for your comment! How fun that the Indy Mini is your hometown race. I LOVED the race. Such great fan support and running on the race track was amazing. Who knew it was sooooo big! Sure doesn’t look that way on T.V. with cars zipping around it!
Glad to hear you’re on the road to recovery with your hip! Here’s to full and speedy healing.
Take care!
Aby
Your smile says it all! Congratulations. I think this one was your biggest accomplishment of the 4 half-marathons, given your injury. And I love how you thought it through and changed your perspective. It would have been so easy to fall all the way into the comparison trap, but I’m glad you found the time to enjoy it. I have only run a few races (much shorter). Some were with a friend; with her I ran faster than I even realized I could, because she put us up front at the start. I was proud, but it wasn’t fun–I thought I was going to die! The others were with my young daughter, so of course the pace was slower. But honestly it was so much more fun, for the reasons you mentioned. It was so nice to enjoy the day and all the nice signs and spectators. Lots of lessons in this post. Thanks.
Thank you, Nancy! I know the feeling of running with faster runners and feeling like you’re going to die! So not fun. 🙂 How wonderful that you and your daughter have run races together. Such amazing memories you’ve created. 🙂
Congrats! Thanks so much for the article and the encouragement.
You’re welcome. Glad it connected with you. 🙂
Congratulations! on so many levels… for deciding to participate in the race despite your injury and not being 100%… for deciding to change your perspective and enjoy the day…for thanking all of the people that were there to support you and the othe runners…for verbally thanking all of the volunteers that give so much without thought of compensation…for sharing your experience with us. A wise person said that the only person you should compare yourself to is yourself. You determine the goals and your success according to the contributing factors for each situation. Your article was a great reminder not to lose sight of our own definition of success, not perfection.
Thank you, Sylvia! I really appreciate your thoughtful words.
Thank-you for sharing your thoughts and perspective, and many congratulations on achieving what you decided to. You are reminding me that it keeps things very simple when we just focus on what we need to do next, without expending energy on filling our heads with the distractions of what others are doing! Hoping for swift healing for your foot too :).
Many thanks for the swift healing wishes! 🙂 I’m still hobbling around, but my hobbling is faster than it was on Sunday! Progress. 🙂
Love your thought about staying focused what we need to do next, without getting distracted by others. Well put!
Thanks for your comment!
Yes, its better to focus on ourselves. Sometimes its better to not only forget about keeping up with our friends but also forgo a race and a lot of running to let our sports injuries heal. Because if we don’t we not only won’t race like we used to, we won’t even be able to walk like we used to which could impact our daily lives eventually making day-to-day achievements painful or difficult. Best of luck on the healing of your body…the most important thing…more important than any race.
So true! Thanks for the reminder. 🙂
Hi Aby, Congratulations on your successful marathon. I loved what you wrote. It really struck a cord with me. I have an injury that has resulted in disabling consequences, so I am not able to do what I used to do. I was sad for a long time, but then had to make a decision about how I wanted to live my days and what could I still do, even if it wasn’t like before. I have had to change my perspective and can’t compare myself to others or even to my “old self”. This has brought me to a much better place all around and I can still have success, even if it looks differently than before. Thanks again for sharing your encouraging words.
And thank you for sharing your story, Judy. So inspiring!!
Congrats and Thanks for your insightful perspective!
This is such an easy trap to fall into, we all need reminders that doing our best with what we have is what it is all about. Thanks again.